Posted on

Confessions…

Well, here we are back up and running!  I apologize, as I was running the black Friday sale I started getting messages the site was down.  When I contacted GoDaddy the first tech told me that it was a DNS propagation issue and that if the site wasn’t back up by Sunday, to call in again.  Sunday morning rolls around, I realize SWT isn’t up and I call in, to be told that the original tech was 100% incorrect, somehow auto renew had been turned off for our annual billing options.  Hm.  So a tidy sum of money later for “restoration” fees and the page is back.  I appreciate all the emails of concern and offers of help SWT being down generated.  I just can’t say it enough:  You guys are AWESOME!!!  The black friday sale was a bust, and I apologize.  To all of you who wrote to me, trying to play in the game, I’ll be sending you all emails with coupon codes for your time and energy.  Some of your responses had me rolling on the floor as I read them.

Confession time, now:  SWT and I enjoyed an amazing, amazing sex life.  He tried the files on me for efficacy and to see if he could modify my behaviors or prompt me to do things in different ways in the bedroom.  The subliminals we tested on me were the jalapeno that adds that perfect dash of heat and spice to an amazing salsa.  I’m dying here.  I’m 2500 miles away from my friends and my family.  When SWT died, literally all physical intimacy–hugs, kisses, hand holding, EVERYTHING– died, too.  It’s been seven weeks and there are days I feel like rolling around in my front yard meowing, seeing if that will attract any attention.  My girlfriends all tell me “Get some toys!  No Shame!!” and believe me you, I’ve been introduced to a couple sites that certainly sparked…hmmm. I don’t know.  I will say they were extremely colorful and eye-opening, and I was pretty sure I had seen it all.  Besides, as good couples know, it’s not just about the “O”, it’s just as much the leading up to it that makes or breaks a sexual encounter.  Toys have their place, and it’s a mindblowing one–but it’s not replacing a partner outright.  At least not in my book.

Anyway, I digress.  I am devoted to you all, and to making SWT run with envelope pushing, effective files.  However, my devotion stops short of enduring the kind of frustration testing those files would leave me in, with absolutely no outlet.  This is where I need my community to rally around again and help me.  I need beta testers, badly.   If you are interested in testing files for me, email me.  Let me know what kind of files you would be willing to try–and would you be flexible in deviating from your typical file type if I were to be rolling something out that I really needed an efficacy check of?  I will select people and place them in groups.  Not every group will test every file; you’ll be given a group number or letter and I’ll assign file testing (and given files) based on that.

This will also be my last public interaction with the site through early January.  I am exhausted.  My life behind the SWT face is in turmoil as I try to tie up loose ends, and bring the business under my name for future  transactions.  My kids are grieving and the two oldest are having really hard times without their dad right now.  I am running around trying to be everyone to everybody, all the time–and to get all the side business done, too. Therefore, I’ve decided that I am going to take a month’s leave starting December 10.  SWT and my wedding anniversary is December 19, we would have been married 8 years.  Then comes Christmas, and the second month (to the day) since he passed.  January 8 is his birthday.  He would have been 49.  I still get head spins when I think of how young he was, and how much life we had in front of us.  We were together for almost 9 years in total (We officially started dating on Feb 14, 2009.)  I am 36.  I never planned for this, everybody.  I still can’t fathom that in the blink of an eye, he will have been gone from my life longer than he was in it.  That at my age, I can live another lifetime and a half from this moment, until it is time to be with him again.

I need time to focus on myself, and to be there for the kids and try to salvage what I can for them from the wreckage that has become this year’s holiday season.  I need to sit down and spend some quality time with the sound mixing software we use to generate the files, and bring myself up to speed.  More than anything, I just need to be able to stare in to space and let the emotions roll through me, without having to worry that they are ill placed and inconvenient for the moment at hand.

In the meanwhile, I will still be active behind the scenes.  I’m working through a crazy huge pile of emails. I WILL get to yours, and respond.  If it takes a bit I apologize, but I am literally sorting through 2 months of digital correspondence.  I really love reading your emails.  So, to that direction, even though I am swamped, keep sending suggestions in, or personal anecdotes.  Send me an email if you’re interested in being a beta tester.  I will be updating emails and making some changes while I’m on leave, so keep an eye out for those.

 

Happy Holidays, everyone!  Be safe and I can’t wait to see you in the new year!!  xoxoxoxo

 

Coupon: Jollyholidays (25% off) Now-December 26

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.